Week 2 Story: Desperate Times
Note: This story is now part of my Porfolio website. This website will have the more current version.
In a swamp you could hear the hungry whines of a young crocodile.
"Dad, I am so hungry! I think I might die if I don't eat soon. We haven't eaten in 2 days," said the young crocodile.
"I know son, but there are no animals left for us to eat," said the crocodile.
"I am so hungry I might even try to eat the fruits off of the trees,",said the young crocodile.
"Well let me know when you can climb up a tree," said the crocodile chuckling.
"Better yet, how about you bring that monkey so we can eat him," said the young crocodile with his eyes gleaming and his stomach growling.
"Son, the monkey is my friend. I don't eat my friends," said the crocodile.
However, as the days went on the crocodile became hungrier and his son's whining became louder.
"Fine, I will convince the monkey that this is like any other trip to the other side of the swamp," said the crocodile.
Every once in a while, the monkey would ride on the crocodile's back and get to the other side of the swamp to get fruit. They became friends that way exchanging conversations and laughter. However, desperate times called for desperate measures. The crocodile needed to put his son's health first before his friendship with the monkey. Therefore, he called the monkey over asking him if he needed a ride to the other side of the swamp. The monkey took up his offer and got on the crocodile's back.
"Thank you so much for always taking me to the other side of the swamp friend." said the monkey.
"..." there was no response from the crocodile.
"You're being awfully quiet, is it your wife's death anniversary again?" said the monkey.
The crocodile wanted so badly to give the monkey to his son, but he could not bear to do it. Especially, after the monkey always came to talk to him about his wife when he was sad. He was a friend that cared.
"The reason I wanted you to ride on my back today was because my son and I were so hungry that we were going to eat you," confessed the crocodile
"You know you can always count on me. I will give you another source of food! I know you like meat, but you should really give fruit a try!," said the monkey.
"How can you be so kind to me after I planned on eating you. I feel so bad. I am so sorry!," cried the crocodile.
"I understand that you were just trying to support your family. I forgive you. Now come and take me to the other side of the swamp so I can share my fruit with you and your son," said the monkey.
"Thank you," said the crocodile.
From then on, the crocodile and his son never went hungry for the monkey always brought them fruit after the crocodile took him to the other side of the swamp.
Author's Note: This story is a spin off of "The Crocodile and the Monkey's Heart". In the original story, the crocodile schemes to get the monkey in the water by telling him he will help the monkey get to the other side. The monkey who is a reincarnation of Buddha is able to outsmart the crocodile and get to the other side safely. The crocodile gets fooled and swims away in defeat. I wanted to put a little spin on the story so the crocodile didn't seem that bad. He is a single father trying to provide for his child. Although he steps in the wrong direction, the monkey is able to guide him back on the right path.
Bibliography. "The Crocodile and the Monkey's Heart" from Jataka Anthology by Marie L. Shedlock The Crocodile and the Monkey's Heart
In a swamp you could hear the hungry whines of a young crocodile.
"Dad, I am so hungry! I think I might die if I don't eat soon. We haven't eaten in 2 days," said the young crocodile.
"I know son, but there are no animals left for us to eat," said the crocodile.
"I am so hungry I might even try to eat the fruits off of the trees,",said the young crocodile.
"Well let me know when you can climb up a tree," said the crocodile chuckling.
"Better yet, how about you bring that monkey so we can eat him," said the young crocodile with his eyes gleaming and his stomach growling.
"Son, the monkey is my friend. I don't eat my friends," said the crocodile.
However, as the days went on the crocodile became hungrier and his son's whining became louder.
"Fine, I will convince the monkey that this is like any other trip to the other side of the swamp," said the crocodile.
Every once in a while, the monkey would ride on the crocodile's back and get to the other side of the swamp to get fruit. They became friends that way exchanging conversations and laughter. However, desperate times called for desperate measures. The crocodile needed to put his son's health first before his friendship with the monkey. Therefore, he called the monkey over asking him if he needed a ride to the other side of the swamp. The monkey took up his offer and got on the crocodile's back.
"Thank you so much for always taking me to the other side of the swamp friend." said the monkey.
"..." there was no response from the crocodile.
"You're being awfully quiet, is it your wife's death anniversary again?" said the monkey.
The crocodile wanted so badly to give the monkey to his son, but he could not bear to do it. Especially, after the monkey always came to talk to him about his wife when he was sad. He was a friend that cared.
"The reason I wanted you to ride on my back today was because my son and I were so hungry that we were going to eat you," confessed the crocodile
"You know you can always count on me. I will give you another source of food! I know you like meat, but you should really give fruit a try!," said the monkey.
"How can you be so kind to me after I planned on eating you. I feel so bad. I am so sorry!," cried the crocodile.
"I understand that you were just trying to support your family. I forgive you. Now come and take me to the other side of the swamp so I can share my fruit with you and your son," said the monkey.
"Thank you," said the crocodile.
From then on, the crocodile and his son never went hungry for the monkey always brought them fruit after the crocodile took him to the other side of the swamp.
(Picture of a Monkey by the Water Publicdomainpictures)
Author's Note: This story is a spin off of "The Crocodile and the Monkey's Heart". In the original story, the crocodile schemes to get the monkey in the water by telling him he will help the monkey get to the other side. The monkey who is a reincarnation of Buddha is able to outsmart the crocodile and get to the other side safely. The crocodile gets fooled and swims away in defeat. I wanted to put a little spin on the story so the crocodile didn't seem that bad. He is a single father trying to provide for his child. Although he steps in the wrong direction, the monkey is able to guide him back on the right path.
Bibliography. "The Crocodile and the Monkey's Heart" from Jataka Anthology by Marie L. Shedlock The Crocodile and the Monkey's Heart
I think your spin on "The Crocodile and the Monkey's Heart" was very creative. I also really love the themes you included. Loyalty and trust in family and friends is very important. I also thought you did a really good job of writing the dialog in this story. One idea that I think could have really added to the story is if you included a final scene where the crocodile talks to his son about what could be learned from the monkey. As a parent, it is important to teach your children lessons. Something like "Son, Monkey taught me today a lesson on forgiveness. I told him that we planned on eating him, and instead of getting mad, he forgave me and gave us fruit to eat. This is a mark of a true friend." Overall, really good story. I enjoyed reading!
ReplyDeleteI loved this story! I am a sucker for a good ending and a lesson learned every now and then. I like how you took something from the original story of deceit and karma in a way, and added the forgiveness factor and how to give compassion to others as the monkey gave to the crocodile such as helping him even after he tried to eat him. I think its a great lesson overall and it was cool of you to think to add it.
ReplyDeleteThis is an interesting take on the story. I like the elements you used to make the character of the crocodile more relatable, and less of a black-and-white villain. By changing it from getting the monkey's heart for his greedy wife to trying to provide for his starving son, he is a much more sympathetic character. Then, by having him be a single father, and a widower, it puts the readers even more on his side. Excellent character development.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading your story. I think that your version was interesting. I loved the fact that instead of having the crocodile swim off in defeat, you allowed the monkey to forgive the crocodile. With that being said, your story showed a theme of forgiveness and even kindness at the end of the story, having the monkey continue to stay friends with the crocodile and giving him another food source to allow his family to survive. I think that showed a lot of kindness from the monkey, and I really liked how you wrote about the character.
ReplyDeleteI wrote my story on the same Jakata and I really enjoyed your take on the story. I think that father/son dynamic made it so endearing and I like the innocent boy much better than the temptress type character in the original. A single father trying to provide for his son is a very good reason for a break in moral code, but why is there no more food for them to eat? Did something happen to the swamp, or did the father/son pair just use up all of their resources? I was thinking, what if the lack of food source had something to do with the mom's death. It could be an outside force like hunters/fishermen, or something like the small swamp just couldn't sustain the three of them. That could be an even stronger driving force for the father's behavior.
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ReplyDeleteGreat story! The characterization of the monkey and the crocodile as friends gives the story some emotional depth - the crocodile wants to (needs to!) feed his son, but doesn't want to betray his friend, the monkey. I also like how you didn't explicitly state that the crocodile's wife had died, but subtly inserted it in the dialogue. That's a fantastic way exposition can be worked in and you did it beautifully! I can definitely see this being published in a children's book that retold classic tales in with a new perspective.
ReplyDeleteTheir being friends also gives a solution to the crocodiles' hunger problems, though I can't imagine a crocodile living off of fruit! Would the nutritional value of the fruit be enough to sustain a crocodile? Is there enough fruit for the rest of the monkeys if this monkey is giving it to the crocodile? That would be a cool development to see.